T
H E
W E D D I N G
O F
E M I LY
C A R T
E R
&
J A K E
T
H O M P S O N
Maid of Honor Speech
Delivered
by
Sarah
Miller
·
June
13, 2026 ·
The
Garden
House
,
Hudson
Valley
,
NY
Good
evening
,
everyone
!
For
those
of
you
who
don
’
t
know
me
,
I
’
m
Sarah
—
Emily
’
s
best
friend
of
sixteen
years
,
personal
archivist
of
her
most
embarrassing
moments
,
and
the
only
person
here
who
has
watched
her
demolish
an
entire
sleeve
of
Oreos
while
insisting
it
was
“
mindful
eating
.”
We
met
on
the
first
day
of
seventh
grade
.
I
was
the
new
kid
,
and
within
ten
minutes
I
hit
a
patch
of
ice
and
slid
—
full
speed
,
in
front
of
everyone
—
straight
into
the
school
flagpole
.
Devastating
.
There
were
witnesses
.
But
Emily
,
this
perfect
stranger
,
ran
over
,
handed
me
a
Band
-
Aid
,
and
said
,
very
seriously
: “
That
was
the
coolest
thing
I
’
ve
ever
seen
.”
I
knew
in
that
moment
we
would
be
friends
for
life
.
And
that
,
ladies
and
gentlemen
,
is
the
story
Emily
specifically
begged
me
not
to
tell
tonight
.
So
the
evening
is
already
going
great
.
Emily
is
the
most
loyal
person
I
know
.
She
’
s
the
friend
who
shows
up
at
your
door
at
seven
in
the
morning
with
coffee
because
you
cried
in
the
group
chat
the
night
before
.
She
once
drove
three
hours
,
at
midnight
,
to
bring
me
a
phone
charger
—
because
I
texted
her
“
this
is
an
emergency
,”
and
in
my
defense
,
it
was
.
My
phone
was
at
two
percent
.
She
’
s
also
the
only
person
I
know
who
can
argue
with
you
passionately
for
twenty
minutes
about
a
movie
she
’
s
never
seen
—
and
somehow
still
end
up
being
right
.
I
’
m
still
mad
about
it
.
So
when
Emily
introduced
me
to
Jake
—
an
engineer
who
“
actually
finishes
what
he
says
he
’
ll
do
” —
I
was
suspicious
.
But
then
he
remembered
my
name
.
Then
he
remembered
my
coffee
order
.
And
then
,
without
being
asked
,
he
fixed
our
apartment
’
s
garbage
disposal
.
I
pulled
Emily
aside
and
said
, “
Okay
.
What
’
s
wrong
with
him
?”
Two
years
later
,
we
still
haven
’
t
found
anything
.
The
universe
took
one
look
at
Emily
Carter
and
decided
she
deserved
a
man
who
closes
the
pickle
jar
without
being
asked
.
1 / 2
Jake
—
sixteen
years
of
research
has
taught
me
this
:
Emily
’
s
love
language
is
having
her
exact
Chipotle
order
remembered
.
The
guac
is
non
-
negotiable
.
Always
the
guac
.
And
Emily
,
sweetheart
—
you
found
someone
who
makes
you
laugh
when
you
’
re
hangry
,
who
slow
-
dances
with
you
in
the
kitchen
,
and
who
sings
just
as
badly
as
you
do
.
That
’
s
not
love
.
That
’
s
camouflage
.
Married
people
need
each
other
.
T HE
T O AS T
[
Raise
your
glass
.
Look
at
the
couple
.]
Everyone
,
please
raise
your
glass
.
To
Emily
and
Jake
—
may
your
life
together
be
loud
and
full
of
laughter
.
May
you
always
remember
each
other
’
s
coffee
orders
.
And
may
every
disagreement
end
the
way
our
friendship
always
has
:
with
someone
offering
snacks
,
and
someone
admitting
they
were
wrong
.
It
’
s
usually
me
.
To
Emily
and
Jake
!
2 / 2
