Friendliness
The
list
All
24
traits
in
one
pass
—
the
detail
sections
below
follow
in
the
same
order
.
01
Warmth
Glad
you
'
re
here
.
02
Approachability
Easy
to
walk
up
to
.
03
Kindness
Assumes
good
faith
.
04
Positive
Disposition
Lifts
the
room
'
s
mood
.
05
Sincerity
Same
person
in
every
room
.
06
Generosity
Gives
without
keeping
score
.
07
Playfulness
Light
,
not
unserious
.
08
Empathy
Reads
what
wasn
'
t
said
.
09
Active
Listening
Listens
to
understand
.
10
Attentiveness
Remembers
the
small
things
.
11
Diplomacy
&
Tact
Hard
truths
,
no
marks
left
.
12
Social
Adaptability
Adjusts
to
the
room
.
13
Encouragement
Says
the
good
thing
out
loud
.
14
Inclusiveness
Widens
the
circle
.
15
Trust
Doubt
benefits
first
.
16
Open
-
mindedness
Hears
the
whole
case
.
17
Forgiveness
Closes
the
file
.
18
Humility
Fine
not
being
the
main
event
.
19
Cooperativeness
Takes
the
shared
win
.
20
Patience
Tone
holds
under
delay
.
21
Reliability
Shows
up
as
promised
.
22
Courtesy
Keeps
the
small
formalities
.
23
Gratitude
Names
what
you
contributed
.
24
Respect
for
Boundaries
Offers
once
,
accepts
no
.
1 / 5
The
traits
in
detail
Grouped
into
four
clusters
:
what
people
feel
first
,
how
the
warmth
is
delivered
,
how
you
hold
other
people
,
and
what
makes
it
last
.
C L US T ER
0 1
Core
Warmth
What
someone
registers
in
the
first
thirty
seconds
—
before
you
'
ve
said
anything
substantive
.
Warmth
The
baseline
signal
that
you
are
genuinely
glad
the
other
person
is
here
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Greets
people
by
name
,
sounds
pleased
rather
than
neutral
,
makes
eye
contact
before
speaking
.
Approachability
Low
cost
to
engage
—
nobody
has
to
work
up
to
talking
to
you
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Open
posture
,
phone
down
,
an
expression
that
invites
an
interruption
instead
of
warning
one
off
.
Kindness
A
default
assumption
of
good
faith
about
other
people
'
s
motives
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Explains
a
mistake
as
a
misunderstanding
before
assuming
carelessness
.
Positive
Disposition
A
baseline
mood
that
adds
energy
to
a
room
rather
than
drawing
from
it
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Brings
lightness
to
ordinary
moments
and
doesn
'
t
need
the
day
to
be
good
to
be
good
company
.
Sincerity
The
warmth
is
real
—
there
is
no
second
version
of
you
saved
for
later
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Praise
given
in
public
matches
the
feedback
given
in
private
.
Generosity
Gives
time
,
attention
,
credit
,
and
resources
without
keeping
a
ledger
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Shares
the
win
in
the
group
note
and
names
the
people
who
actually
did
the
work
.
Playfulness
Can
be
light
without
being
unserious
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Teases
gently
,
laughs
at
themselves
,
and
knows
when
the
joke
has
done
its
job
and
stops
.
2 / 5
C L US T ER
0 2
Attention
&
Skill
The
learned
half
of
friendliness
—
how
the
warmth
actually
gets
delivered
.
Empathy
Reads
what
someone
is
feeling
,
not
just
what
they
said
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Notices
the
pause
before
the
answer
and
asks
a
second
,
gentler
question
.
Active
Listening
Listens
to
understand
,
not
to
load
the
next
reply
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Summarises
what
was
said
before
responding
,
and
asks
follow
-
up
questions
that
couldn
'
t
have
been
scripted
.
Attentiveness
Holds
on
to
small
details
about
people
and
uses
them
well
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Remembers
a
child
'
s
name
,
a
hard
week
,
a
project
someone
was
quietly
stressed
about
.
Diplomacy
&
Tact
Delivers
difficult
things
without
leaving
a
mark
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Criticises
the
work
,
never
the
person
—
and
raises
the
problem
in
private
first
.
Social
Adaptability
Adjusts
tone
,
pace
,
and
register
to
whoever
is
in
front
of
them
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Matches
a
colleague
'
s
formality
,
a
friend
'
s
humour
,
and
a
stranger
'
s
preferred
distance
.
Encouragement
Says
the
affirming
thing
out
loud
,
without
being
asked
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Names
a
specific
strength
rather
than
offering
a
general
compliment
.
Inclusiveness
Actively
brings
the
quietest
person
into
the
conversation
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Redirects
a
question
to
someone
who
hasn
'
t
spoken
yet
,
and
doesn
'
t
let
an
inside
joke
close
the
circle
.
3 / 5
C L US T ER
0 3
Openness
&
Trust
How
you
hold
other
people
when
there
is
nothing
to
gain
from
being
generous
.
Trust
Extends
the
benefit
of
the
doubt
before
the
evidence
arrives
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Assumes
a
missed
deadline
has
a
reason
,
and
asks
what
it
was
.
Open
-
mindedness
Withholds
judgement
long
enough
to
actually
hear
the
position
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Can
restate
an
opposing
view
well
enough
that
the
person
holding
it
agrees
with
the
summary
.
Forgiveness
Doesn
'
t
keep
a
running
tab
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Resolves
an
issue
once
,
and
doesn
'
t
resurface
it
three
months
later
as
ammunition
.
Humility
Comfortable
not
being
the
most
important
person
in
the
room
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Says
"
I
don
'
t
know
"
readily
,
and
lets
someone
else
take
the
credit
and
the
applause
.
Cooperativeness
Chooses
the
shared
win
over
the
personal
one
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Gives
ground
on
a
preference
that
doesn
'
t
matter
,
to
protect
a
decision
that
does
.
4 / 5
C L US T ER
0 4
Steadiness
&
Respect
The
traits
that
make
warmth
survive
contact
with
a
bad
day
,
a
tight
deadline
,
or
a
disagreement
.
Patience
Keeps
composure
when
things
take
longer
than
they
should
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Repeats
an
explanation
the
second
time
without
a
change
in
tone
.
Reliability
Shows
up
when
they
said
they
would
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Sends
the
update
before
it
'
s
asked
for
,
and
cancels
with
notice
rather
than
disappearing
.
Courtesy
The
small
,
unglamorous
formalities
,
kept
consistently
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Thanks
the
person
who
refilled
the
water
,
holds
the
door
,
replies
to
the
message
.
Gratitude
Names
what
other
people
contributed
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Says
specifically
what
someone
'
s
help
made
possible
,
rather
than
a
generic
thank
-
you
.
Respect
for
Boundaries
Warm
without
being
intrusive
.
IN
P RA C T IC E
Offers
help
once
,
accepts
a
no
the
first
time
,
and
doesn
'
t
take
the
answer
personally
.
5 / 5
